tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post7099893097058932123..comments2023-02-17T08:25:56.846-05:00Comments on Intimate Family: Time Out or Tough Love?Jenniferhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03561872384835769813noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-5934443494095710632010-11-04T22:13:43.624-04:002010-11-04T22:13:43.624-04:00Great post, Jen!
Growing up, when we misbehaved, ...Great post, Jen!<br /><br />Growing up, when we misbehaved, we had to pick out our own switch from a tree! There were nine of us, and we learned early on, there would be punishment if we were disrespectful. I never thought anything of that. My parents loved us and we knew that. And all nine of us have turned out to be kind, sensitive people. <br /><br />I will agree with Jai, though, that not allDorrainehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05953973448175171825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-30355873290007143812010-11-03T14:01:33.643-04:002010-11-03T14:01:33.643-04:00Jennifer, sometimes I wonder at how so many things...Jennifer, sometimes I wonder at how so many things are different from when I was a child and that wasn't that long ago! But then I grew up in England and my parents were Indian. So I had a slightly more strict upbringing because of my cultural background. But I still think that was much better than the way kids are brought up these days, with them running wild and undisciplined and medicated.Jai Joshihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04858987106548357551noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-32389506359135923062010-11-01T23:36:46.003-04:002010-11-01T23:36:46.003-04:00Thanks so much Colleen for your comment! It sheds ...Thanks so much Colleen for your comment! It sheds a bright light on these delemmas allowing parents (like me) to focus on what exactly is our punishment teaching our children? You made a very clear distinction that a "punishment" is worth squat without rationale.....a true balance of love in different forms.....Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03561872384835769813noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-37030618395290101342010-11-01T23:25:36.833-04:002010-11-01T23:25:36.833-04:00Jai,..this is partly the reason for the post... Le...Jai,..this is partly the reason for the post... Let's diagnose this behavior since we haven't the patience to deal with it. A "pill" takes affect so much sooner. I agree also that there are just some personalities that decide on choosing their own path... free will. Unfortunately, how it affects the cycle of life appears to be more & more disturbing as each generation ages. Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03561872384835769813noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-86791748223534993342010-11-01T23:14:01.974-04:002010-11-01T23:14:01.974-04:00Warren & Michelle,..I LOVE hearing/listening t...Warren & Michelle,..I LOVE hearing/listening to husband/wife opinions on parenting issues,...so colorful! Warren,..where do you think I got this idea? (Re:Geico commercial)Ok, that & 8 years in a prison dealing with adults not taking any accountability for their actions. Segway to Michelle,...where did most of these "bad seeds" get their behavior? Yep,...the parents. Or lack Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03561872384835769813noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-91497611419485476222010-11-01T22:50:39.703-04:002010-11-01T22:50:39.703-04:00Oh Ray,..It is few & far between,...when you r...Oh Ray,..It is few & far between,...when you really yell. I feel the same when I see my childrens reactions, and question if any of my discipline is effective. I think every parent asks that question. Whether it is time outs or tough love. When I wrote this it was for help, and overall views of how parents are dealing with the changing world,..and their changing children. Iron sharpens iron ;)Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03561872384835769813noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-69520867611259609702010-11-01T18:59:40.581-04:002010-11-01T18:59:40.581-04:00I believe the reason so many people turned to &quo...I believe the reason so many people turned to "time-out" and not hitting their children was for a number of reasons. For one, there is no doubt that a number of us in our generation and earlier can realistically say that some of it crossed over to downright abusive. <br /><br />Being hit with a belt may have been effective in keeping you from doing something again...but it was fear thatColleennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-47268817121411363252010-11-01T14:40:27.637-04:002010-11-01T14:40:27.637-04:00I do believe that children need to be taught certa...I do believe that children need to be taught certain boundaries. They need structure and to know that there are limits to what they can get away with. The occasional spanking can be a tool in this. Most kids can be disciplined in this way and it works.<br /><br />At the same time, I've seen that with some kids it doesn't matter if you spank them. They don't want to listen. Or perhaps Jai Joshihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04858987106548357551noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-44466973716258664522010-11-01T12:26:56.078-04:002010-11-01T12:26:56.078-04:00Hi Jen!
I totally get your frustration, and I'...Hi Jen!<br /><br />I totally get your frustration, and I'm not sure there is one right answer. <br /><br />I do agree with Warren (good thing since we are raising 3 little people together)that the very best thing we can do for our children is to set an example of what we expect for them to be. WAY easier said than done. <br /><br />Several times in the past, when my child has been Michellenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-91296109928793560772010-11-01T12:11:10.938-04:002010-11-01T12:11:10.938-04:00Sorry this reply got so long, I think it is on top...Sorry this reply got so long, I think it is on topic???<br /><br />Great reply Ray!<br /><br />I am entitled... to live in a nice house, be happy, have a nice car, big TV, food, clothes, pretty much anything that someone else has, and by the way, if I can not or will not earn these things, then the person that has earned these things is going to pay for mine. Shoot, I am entitled to cut you off,Warrenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15856157049386056054noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987342243691407295.post-5324136909469814332010-11-01T11:26:04.903-04:002010-11-01T11:26:04.903-04:00Great topic. Sorry I don't have the answers. S...Great topic. Sorry I don't have the answers. Since we are very close and you know me all too well, I'm not sure if I am the one to ask. First let me say, you are an awesome parent. You have so much to handle with 4 children not to mention the age range. I would go insane with more than just my one. (This is proven by teaching the 5th grade boys in our kids ministry.)<br /><br />For those Rayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13449438990405726732noreply@blogger.com